I went to the gym today. Equinox at 92nd. 2 subway stops and 2 blocks away. I had a free pass (helloooo the only reason!), and let's just say it was interesting...
So I go in to get signed up and stuff, get shown around, pretending that I was actually interested in joining (not that I had a list of 5 other gyms w/ free passes after this one..) Then I headed down to the locker room to change.
WELL apparently the locker room is some sort of nudist colony/ underground lesbian ring. As I was walking to the bathroom to change, I saw BOOBS coming out of the shower! I turn and see MORE BOOBS, as this crazy chick is leaning over with them all out and proud while picking her face in the mirror. 3 more women come towards me in towels only.. OMG OMG. It's insane! Can't these people shower at home? What is happening? So I'm like laughing in the bathroom stall over the ridiculousness of what I've just witnessed, then I come out and go to change my shoes. Homegirl at the mirror slides down closer to me (did she think I needed a better view?!?!?!?!!?!?) and is like boob flashing all over the place! I even saw her ass!! WHAT THE HELL! She wasn't even dressing!! She wasn't even toned!!
She was just doing a towel peep show. I swear she wanted me to look! It was truly bizarre.
So then after I escaped that madness, I was on the weight machines and theres this guy near me listening to music in between reps. Next thing I know he's doing a muted pop-lock all over the place! Repeatedly. I'm guessing he likes the boys... ahhh hahahahhahaa. These people are crazy!!
I went upstairs on the elliptical and burned 300 calories though. Success. 2 more free days. Apparently this is "the best gym in NYC" Yes, aren't they all. Maybe I'll go to a free yoga class on Saturday, but I'm gonna be careful this time to shield my eyes.
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2 comments:
hahahahah this is hilarious. i wish i saw this pop and lock guy!! I would have so tried to bust a move with him! we have to go when i come. I might act like im working out and jsut people watch however, i will shield my eyes from some boobs! holy crap, thats disgusting! alright we must chat soon. another double awaits me. i miss you xoxo
sounds like you had an intresting time in the locker room..lol
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